Tuesday, September 4, 2012

 I struggle with no.
I'm a yes person, you know, unless you are one of my children.
Then no is a word that you are really used to.

The song in the clip above it from They Might Be Giants, they rock.
Their song, No, is one that I frequently reference with my kids.
No means no, no is always no

Get it, got it, good.

Although this is apparently disproved by Ainsley's latest trick, If you let me do it once that I will stop asking you {insert precious smiling face like one of these, I couldn't pick just one, because holy smokes my child is gorgeous and yes, I know I'm totally biased.}

Ha ha, yeah right kid, not so much, but thanks for trying and for batting those pretty blue eyes at me and for flashing me that scrumptious smile of yours.

Sorry, I totally got off on another tangent.
Shiny objects, I blame them.
Or in this case, pretty objects.

Back at it.
I'm trying to say no right now.
Like really really really trying.

Here's the annoying thing about me, not only do I have the hardest time saying no but I then feel the need to justify and explain why I'm saying no.
The guilt of no starts eating away at me.

No, in my mind, is not sufficient enough.

Sure, I'll sign up to be on your committee that will suck 1,000,000 hours of my life that I don't have to devote to ANYTHING else because I have already signed on to do x, y, and z as well as some of the Greek alphabet because stopping at z just wasn't enough.

Yes, I'm being slightly really dramatic, but I do it to point out my annoyance at myself.
I have enough on my plate right now.
Enough that makes me feel I can handle it but anything else could be enough to make me feel slightly loony.

This came to a head tonight as I was at two different events where they had the committee sign up sheets out and people were encouraged to sign up.
No pressure from anyone else, just me pressuring myself.

I have enough committees, activities, commitments and whatever else on my plate.
I just can't sign on for anything else unless it's really important, you know like family.

Family, you get the official Gold Star Card, you're exempt.
I give you my time out of love, not pressure or guilt or anything else.
For you {and friends} I give you that because I want to.
Again, get it, got it, good.

Let me just say that this in no way points the blame at anyone else, just me.

Goal: Learn to say no and let no be enough. There is no need to justify saying no, just no.

Anyone else struggle with this, how do you handle it?


  1. I struggle with this. I have yet to figure out how to deal with it. If I say no, I also feel the need to justify my no and then feel guilty afterwards. I don't like it and I too feel that I have a right to say no and that's that but it never turns out that way. How do you deal with it?